All my life I’ve loved and read books about fantasy worlds with characters as real to me as myself. I’ve read with breathless anticipation as they’ve gone through trials and struggles, were misunderstood, overcame outrageous obstacles or prejudice and triumphed, always triumphed in the end. I know the pattern, I expect the happy ending, I want it, I crave it. But not necessarily for my own life. There I hesitate, stuck in the middle of the story, unable to see the end, not quite the casual outside observer who knows that everything will turn out all right. Will it turn out all right? Maybe, but where is the guarantee?
“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.”
This quote seems very relevant to my life right now…and I’ve acted, accepted my destiny, made the move to another state for a grad program I’m excited about, all in a very short amount of time. Will I succeed or will it be my downfall? I honestly don’t know, but if I don’t try then the status quo will surely be the result. So I’m giving it my best shot, taking the risk, accepting the opportunity to turn my dream into reality. A friend recently commented, “Look what you’ve created, you’ve wanted this for so long and now you’ve made it happen!” But when she said that I balked at taking responsibility and sometimes still find myself holding onto what was, wishing for the comfort of the known, the familiar. Even though I know that here and now is where courage is possible, to let go of the familiar, to become comfortable with the unknown and setting that example of courage for my children as well. And so I’m writing this blog post for me and for you and for everyone that needs encouragement to hold a funeral for our low expectations and find the courage to try for what feels impossible.
“You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.”
