The truth is that we often feel the need to sugar coat the ugly truth. Why is this? I know I do it – sometimes to protect people I love, sometimes to protect myself, sometimes to protect a favorite illusion.
Today I filled out a health survey from my new insurance company. Based on my answers about stress in my life a nurse called to follow up on my health survey results and asked me some more questions. Yes I’ve been stressed, yes I’ve had difficulty sleeping, yes I sometimes have no interest in doing previously enjoyable activities. No I don’t feel like harming myself or others, no I don’t always have an appetite to eat. I was about a 12 on the 0 – 27 depression scale.
The truth is I’ve tried anti-depressants which was pointless and didn’t change anything because I don’t have depression, I have a stressful situation!
The truth is that I’ve talked with friends, counselors, and clergy and they can’t solve my problems or give me answers, they can only give me support and share their opinions and everyone has a different opinion. I talk with God constantly and have received priesthood blessings which have strengthened and encouraged me but I still don’t have the Magic 8 Ball answer.
And now, just when I thought that things were settling down and I could have some semblance of order in my life – the monkey wrench gets thrown in again and I have to deal with a depressing situation all over again that I didn’t want to have to deal with in the first place.
The truth is that this stinks! and the truth is that it’s a great opportunity to grow, and I waffle back and forth between embracing those two realities.
Then recently, just for fun, I started an experiment which has helped refocus my attention away from the stress and back to the beauty in and around my life. You can read more about it here…
and this effort to find something happy in each and every day has helped me focus on the good things I have in life and the beautiful things I want for my life.
Because the truth is that despite the ugliness and stress I truly believe that good things are possible if I keep on moving towards them.
